Wheelie life comes with its own list of challenges.. Here’s my compilation of annoying things I have encountered over the last couple of years..
1. Forgetting to put on shoes before leaving the house.. Or having a shoe fall off when you transfer or go over a bump.. The lesson learned here is that if shoes ‘slip-on’ they will slip-off just as easy.
2. Dropping stuff on the floor.. Bonus points when things fall into the wheelchair rim and then just spin around when you try to get it out.
3. Not turning off the light before getting into bed and having to spend 10 minutes getting back up to turn them off. This is remedied by putting the lights on a remote control.
4. Crumb piles on the floor from my lap where I transfer into bed and in the bathroom. Especially after eating crackers or other crunchy things.
5. Slight floor inclines and slowly rolling if brakes aren’t engaged. It basically turns you into a human-level. This can turn into a bad situation if your chair starts rolling away from you after you transfer into your car (shout-out to keeping reaching/grabbing sticks everywhere).
6. Messy hands from cooking or eating that leave you stranded because you don’t want to get your push-rims dirty. Usually just have to slow-mo push myself over to the sink using my palms, trying to be careful not to make a bigger mess.
7. Chipping nail polish/breaking nails on push rims. Pinching fingers in your brakes or against walls. Or just jamming fingers in general.
8. Things on the top shelf of the fridge/cupboards. You get really adept with a grabbing stick quickly.
9. Cracks in the pavement that almost launch you out of your chair from the sudden stop. And being extra vigilant about avoiding gum or dog poop in my path.
10. Hands freezing to the push-rims without gloves. Winter is not forgiving to wheelchair life. Thankfully I bought a costco pack of gloves and leave them everywhere.
11. Edges of long sleeves getting wet from wheels and long clothing getting caught in the wheels. I usually always have my sleeves rolled up to prevent any problems.
12. Never really feeling completely comfortable. It’s a neutral thing for me, I’m not necessarily uncomfortable, I just never feel that cozy, warm, curl up, and stay-in-bed feeling.
13. People giving you the death stare as a young person parking in an accessible parking spot until you unload your wheelchair. I purposely take my time getting out of my car to make sure they feel extra bad when they see my chair (I probably need to get a new hobby).
14. Meeting up with other wheelie friends and fighting for the accessible spaces.. or the day to day fight with elderly people for the spots.. This is especially pertinent to me since I am usually running late everywhere I go.
15. When someone parks too close to you and you have to get someone to back you car out for you so you can even get in your vehicle (this one is more of a major annoyance).
16. Spending 15 minutes getting snow off the inside and outside of your tires once you get inside.. or leaving trails of water behind you.. This is another reason I always end up running even later during winter. As a side note: taking 2 minutes to get you and your chair in your car when its -30 degrees or when its pouring rain. It feels like the longest 2 minutes ever.
17. When the elevator is broken and you have to take a long roundabout way instead (or get stranded if there’s no other option)
18. Always feeling like you are in the way. This is exasperated when people jump out of your path when you are still 10 feet away (but also low-key hilarious).
19. Taking a long time to answer the door and the person leaves before you get there.
20. Clothes fitting different sitting down. Especially after muscle atrophy and all your pants get baggy.
21. Taking 15 minutes to put on a pair of leggings. It is basically a workout in itself. There’s no more trying multiple outfits on, it’s a one and done situation.
22. Poorly designed ramps with a steep slope and a door at the bottom. I don’t know who designs these things, but it takes the fun out of going down the ramp when I have to slow to a stop at the bottom.
23. Getting carried around like a piece of cargo when a building isn’t accessible. But that said I really appreciate my strong friends lugging me around.
24. Scuffing up the bottom edges of walls and cabinets.
25. Not being able to independently weigh yourself easily. At the hospital there is a special roll-on scale. But you still have to know the weight of your wheelchair and then do some math.
26. When you are tired after a long day you can’t just go lie down and go to sleep. You have to transfer into bed, heave your legs up, drag yourself across the bed, position yourself, and then attempt to fully cover yourself with a blanket (it’s difficult when you sleep on your stomach, if you do it before you flip over you get tangled and trapped in the blanket).
27. Never getting a proper full night’s sleep.. Between re-positioning/turning every few hours, nerve pain and general discomfort.
28. Having strong opinions on terrain type. Worst offenders: cracked pavement, cobblestone, plush carpet, sand, and ice.
29. Maneuvering through obstacle courses of dog toys, clothes, or other stuff on the floor.
30. The dreaded squeaky wheel. It is basically a modern version of Edgar Allan Poe’s The Tell Tale Heart incessantly beating (or in this case squeaking) which you cannot escape until you grease it.
31. Or worse wheel problems: getting a flat tire and getting stranded.. (definitely helpful to keep an emergency repair kit with you)..
32. When you legs don’t fit under the table at a restaurant so you have to sit awkwardly angled sideways.
33. Being acutely reminded of Newton’s Third Law of Motion (every action has an equal and opposite reaction) every time you open/close a drawer, or move something on wheels without your breaks locked or chair angled perpendicularly.
34. Blocking yourself in when you are rearranging furniture (namely chairs and side tables) in an enclosed space
35. Having to take the word “quick” out of my vocabulary.. No more quick showers, or quick bathroom trips. Everything is more of a process now. Not being careful and mindful could potentially lead to dangerous and potentially life-threatening injuries..
36. Accidentally running over a bug and squishing it. The feeling of guilt is palpable.
37. When your foot falls off the footplate without you realizing and you can’t figure out where the scraping sound is coming from.
38. Needing both hands to drive and not being able to drive with one hand out the window on a nice day.
39. The dexterity and physical exertion needed to put on a pair of tight pants. Putting on pants while sitting on them is basically a modern Zen koan. You have to lean and wiggle back and forth no less than a million times.
40. Hard to be sneaky or inconspicuous. A wheelchair screams hey look at me in every situation.
41. Constantly being mindful about liquid intake. Or risk your bladder freaking out and deciding to pee on it’s own accord.
42. Feeling like people are towering over you when having a conversation when people are standing up… (it makes me really appreciate it when someone takes a knee or pops a squat so we can have an eye-to-eye conversation).
43. The fun game of “find the ramp’ when out in public places. More often than not it involves the long way around and doubling back. Or a steep back loading dock ramp.
44. Forgetting to move the blanket before you get into bed. Once you are on top of the blanket, it is pretty much impossible to get underneath it. You have to transfer back out and try again.
45. When your footplate basically turns into a hot plate grill in the sun on hot days and you have to keep it in the shade, or risk cooking your bare feet by accident.
46. Accidently having your foot on the brake when you are driving and wondering why your car is driving weird (and why your car needed replacement brakes).
47. Only being able to see the top of your head in a mirror if it isn’t lowered or angled down.
As much as I like to complain… it’s not all bad.. Just have to learn to laugh it off and roll with it. Thanks for letting me vent it out!
